Proper Facebook Etiquette

#362 Excuse me Mister!

Monday 28th July, 2008

To what degree is it appropriate to post on someone else’s profile?

Of much value on Facebook is the ‘caring and sharing’ ethos of shared items, posted wall scribblings, comments etc. Once Facebook established you become part of the merry roundabout of continuous replacement of new and exciting posts, feeds and actions. Only a natural (or web-based) disaster need get in the way of your essential update and ‘ahoy’ to Facebook friends.

Recently amongst my Facebook friends there’s been some disquiet about the potential effects of featured posts that are not to the users tastes. Anything from a misplaced (but well intended) tagged photo, to the potential damage from a superwall offering that includes something crass or vulgar. Often the offending items are deleted without consequence to either user or poster. But as one friend weighed up, ‘Does this make me a control freak? And why would they post such a thing?’ The ‘thing’ in question was the image of an for-the-wall oversized donkey underparts. Anticipated for mirth rather than irk.

Unfortunately my friend in question has links to her clients on her Facebook profile and a certain image to maintain with other family and Facebook friends that doesn’t involve the appendages on a donkey’s underside. One wonders were such ‘offensive’ items go? Once deleted these could form a collection of Facebook artefacts, to be rediscovered in future years of Facebook old, when donkey parts may be more amusing. Lets keep in mind that even with ‘deletion’ such posts never fall out of the system. Rather they remain in code. Buried, until the next item my donkey friend and you may take offence to.

Donkey friends other dilemma was whether they had (unitentinally) caused offence to the poster by taking the image down. As I pointed out, they posted a donkey’s ding dong, so I doubt there’s risk of that level of self-reflection going on. But this does raise interesting issue about who ‘owns’ and is responsible for material on a profile. Yes you set your profile up, but it’s your friends that love you and can leave you on Facebook.

For now there is agreement that there’s a magnitude of difference between a friendly Facebook superpoke, a teasing wallpost and the ‘value’ of donkey parts being posted to your profile. Etiquette says, if its for hee haw purposes only, probably better (and more amusing) to send via a Facebook message. That way you, the receiver and Donkey remain safe from the potential risk of adding insult to profile.

8 Responses to “#362 Excuse me Mister!”

  1. Dr Mariann Hardey says:

    @ JohnG

    and another question remains, who is the blog comment leaver?…

    Perhaps you?


    More on this in my latest post!

  2. JohnG says:

    My nightmare – which has stopped me participating in any quizzes or comparisons is the viral mechanism which tells everyone referenced in the quiz of the groundbreakingly trivial decisions/comparisons I have made. And if you don’t nominate 10 people to tell – informs all your friends anyway. Facebook is primarily a professional tool for me but I have enjoyed the chaotic invasion of home life to it. However this has given more more than a few heart failures. Not on the home side but as the knockabout of silly jokes pours across to clients present and past. Its too horrible. So now I never answer questions such as who is more intelligent? Who is a better dancer? Better just stop that one right in its tracks…

  3. Miss Maz Hardey says:

    @ Anon,

    yes all in a days work. :-)

  4. Anonymous says:

    Thanks 4 the better font

  5. Anonymous says:

    This is about data ownership. It might seem unimportant but can be used by anyone. See article on hiring practices that use such data to make sure they appoint the right people – Republican

  6. Miss Maz Hardey says:

    @ Mule,

    A facebook legacy. hmm sounds like a film. I’ll be using that for my next FB blog and chapter in the book. :-)

  7. Henry :) says:

    Damm my sunbathing pics

  8. Mule says:

    People are odd. Had not thought but can see that you have to be careful about your Facebook legancy. Thankd for the thought.

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