Proper Facebook Etiquette

#735 Facebook Watchers. Slim fast.

Wednesday 20th May, 2009

Is it ok to Facebook yourself? Frequently. Throughout the same day. Or is this some dangerous new addiction?

Facebook yourself, hmm this sounds as though you have acquired some kind of new (and deviant) social disorder. Or describes the possible fantasy elements best attune to a teenage adolescents imagination. I leave that thought right there.

I assume you’re referring to your ‘need’ to constantly log-in ‘just to check what’s going on’, in order that you may confidently set your social finger to stun and place it on the pulse of the events and actions around you.

Currently we live in a world that celebrates and is swiftly driven by the who, what, when, where – as it happens. As I’ve stated before this is real time sociability that has real time consequences.

And so there’s a level of constant social immersion. Led by a requirement to (as you so aptly put it) ‘Facebook yourself’. I suggest that this is a far cry from a sense of perfected individualism – what I am saying is that you are not self-obsessed – but rather a display of social anxiety and a possible discontent. To Facebook yourself then is not just about you. It is instead a clarification (or seeking of reassurance) for what’s going on that is related to you.

Now networked together we have created this culture and we can’t deny our own tacit for this level of involvement. Looking from the outside in, Facebooking yourself could appear as an obsession. But then few of us could deny that we want to appear as anti-social or detached and then ultimately out of the social loop.

Where does this end? As a ‘dangerous new addiction’? On the one hand social networks make it easier to be in touch, ever more readily available and open to our friends and friends of friends. And, thus, our ‘obsession’ with others intensifies. As it stands signs that you are ‘busy’ are considered unacceptable – ‘why are they taking so long to answer my message?’ a common concern voiced by the most socially networked and tightly wound amongst us (yes, me included). So like you I sit on a narrow precipice. On one side prepared to fall and embrace the network and socially driven constant pokes, tweets and notifications. Then I look into the other, at the abyss. Well it looks dark down there, but strangely (and seductively) peaceful.

For now I’m bridging the gap – I’m not prepared to fall completely over the edge for either one or the other.

And I’m taking comfort in Facebooking myself. For at least the second time today.

Perhaps there’s opportunity for a Facebook Watchers… A social slim-fast, as a social slow down for those living life too networked.

5 Responses to “#735 Facebook Watchers. Slim fast.”

  1. Dr Mariann Hardey says:

    @ Anon,

    Does this even dignify an answer?

    Apparently it does.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Do you have hot photos on your facebook page? Can you add a link?

  3. Conflicted says:

    I’m seeing three guys and two are on Facebook. One is pushing me to friend him but if I do he will see what I post about going about with the other two. Nothing serious all round but this guy is keen and he leaves me feeling pushed into taking things that I do not want too. I might drop him but none have boyfriend status – and I don’t want to take any of them on that way. Why must men push the envelope ?

  4. Dr Mariann Hardey says:

    @ Merv,

    will I?…

    Of course i shall !

  5. Merv says:

    Will you review “The Accidental Billionaires,” by Ben Mezrich take on Facebook’s origins, that is out on i July 14?

    Should be revealing – if you review elsewhere please post a link

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