Proper Facebook Etiquette

#584 I went out in a tight rubber number

Wednesday 4th November, 2009

Sharing URL

Dear Mariann,
I have been invited out (by a Facebook friend) for a first date. It’s been a long time since I encountered this scenario and I am at a loss for what to wear. The venue seems trendy with suitable nocks and crannies. Last week I went out in a tight rubber number (for Halloween) – are there equally high expectations for dating rendezvous?
From Ms LIW by email

What are you worrying about? Flick your hair, flounce to the bar and order the most expensive item on the menu.

If he shows up in tweed, remember that this is typical of the attire of those in rural areas. Usually they are safe to ignore, happily shooting things etc. You may have cause for concern should he offer to show you the ferret in his trousers though…

IF this scenario occurs, step riiiiiiiiight back and take the first available transport out of There – trendy or otherwise.

Re. the rubber, only for special occasions when you can shut the doors and bite the pillow.

12 Responses to “#584 I went out in a tight rubber number”

  1. News of the World says:

    Oh yes and look at the lovely people on – If grinning charmer Dominic Baronet is your Facebook friend delete him NOW – or he'll have you PREGNANT in a just a few clicks.

    Love rat Baronet has been branded The Sperminator for getting TWELVE girls pregnant after wooing them on the social networking site – two of them on the SAME DAY.

    A few days later Stacy told Baronet she was pregnant too. She said: "He smiled at first then said I had to get rid of it. I was furious. I wasn't terminating it and he finally got used to the idea."

    But when Kerry discovered on Facebook about pregnant Stacy she was furious, too. Kerry said: "I messaged Stacy saying I needed to talk to her urgently. I contacted Hayley too.

    "And she told me he'd cheated on ALL of us with a 50-year-old women AND two sisters! She even revealed how on that day of June 24 he had actually been with HER as well as me and Stacy."

    News of the World

  2. Kippy says:

    Shift in topic but don't U think Facebook also displays bad manners? I'm thinking of the scam ads that fool people by pretending to get U to take part in a survey. IMO bad manners. For example that Burger King marketing campaign got people to "unfriend" their contacts in exchange for a free cheeseburger – simply a scam.

  3. Anonymous says:

    i hate the competitive wall posing and updates that gone on once a date has taken place. Puts a lot of pressure on to conform to people's expectations.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Trouble here is that everyone will want news on the wire once you do this. Can be embarrassing as comments are very public. I did a date and then had to read comments about how I was too skinny, rude and so on because i did not fancy the guy. Felt bullied by his mates as i did not come across.

  5. Anonymous says:

    You would think it was possible to check people out on Facebook BUT NO. I went three dates a guy in my network and was telling a co-worker about him. She said oh yea you know he has a live in girl friend and the three year old! I challenge him on an email and he just change his settings and disappeared. Bastard !!!

  6. SalB says:

    I don't think Facebook is a dating site. Had two FB dates – one guy turned up fat and thick – despite all the FB evidence to the opposite and the the was a serial groper – even for at the one and only lunch time coffee meet. Posted on their wall that I was otherwise engaged but then had weeks of unwanted FB attention from their networked mates!
    My advice keep off.

  7. Dr Mariann Hardey says:

    @Rob, he'll probably quite enjoy being 'picked'…

  8. Rob says:

    On the bright side, I suppose it shouldn't be too difficult to pick him out in a crowd.

  9. Dr Mariann Hardey says:

    Wise words indeed. Establish whether or not he has all his own teeth. And if he's keen on basements. If in doubt of any rubber tendencies look for talc marks.

    although that twitching (of a non bird watching variety) in his right eye may give him away too.

  10. Dr Mariann Hardey says:

    @Tony, second date. WOW you're practically 'in a relationship'…

    more on this later…

  11. Rob says:

    If I may be allowed to contribute, you want to be very very suspicious of those metropolitan rural types. He probably hunts.

    Rubber, in particular, can get you into all sorts of trouble. If he's the sort of posh pseud that he sounds, bear in mind that that lot have all sorts of weird sexual hang-ups. Wearing rubber might just send him over the edge.

  12. tony says:

    Now that we've jhad first date advice, can we please turn to second date scenarios and the dangers of over facebook status updating about dates…

Leave a Reply