Proper Facebook Etiquette

#588 When a come on is a come off.

Wednesday 18th November, 2009

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Dear Mariann,
A close friend of mine messaged me to say that he is ‘coming out’. Apparently he IS bisexual. He has updated his Status to ‘its complicated’ and sent me a relationship request. What do I do? I don’t want to offend him, but his come on is a come off.
From TigerTigerMan via email.

I would adopt an ‘understanding’, nay sympathetic, tonality. This can be difficult to do on Facebook but, if you insist on keeping your distance at this delicate stage, perhaps a ‘hey, thanks for the update ‘buddy” to establish a ‘matey’ dialogue in the first. Then, followed-up by a ‘hope it all goes well for you‘ closing to emphasise your status as an independent FRIEND might get you outside of this potential sticky situation. Hitting ‘decline’ will also do the same thing. If less subtlety and with more broken hearts to boot.

Then, next time he contacts you there will be no need to leap away from the monitor at a vociferate of decibels with, ‘Do you mind if I sit back a little? Because your Status is very unsettling’. Instead you will be able to smile and admire his blatant come on. And all in good humour. Because he is a chum.

ps ‘TigerTigerMan’? I’m not sure what to make of that.

One Response to “#588 When a come on is a come off.”

  1. BiPride says:

    I'm Bi and change my status to make it easier to tell those in my netwrok who did not know> Got some mixed reactions and some thought I did it to hit on them. Well they should be of lucky! Want to point out that people should think about how to do this and remeber that FB can be very public -so think about who – even in the future – you may not want to knoe this. Thanks for the Blog.

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