#284 Special Advisor
Dear Mariann,
Deliberate provocation is the specialty of the Irriguous Sheets (those less-than-broadsheets publications) and it would be infantile to lower yourself to the inappropriateness of a de-friending. This would translate into ‘something to hide’, rather than a ‘right to reply’ and you would lose all professional footholds in the process. Equally, it would be unwise to push any other family members into the lime light. To solve your ‘problem’ there is little to be gained in shouting about the implausibility/ludicrous touches of your story. Plenty of the Irriguous Sheet readers prefer improvisations to the facts.
Mr Vague, now that I reflect on your ‘dilemma’ I marvel at its lucidity and how accurately it portrays provincial life – a certain type of relations and a certain type of encounter that does exist. The widespread sharing of rooms among professional men is only a mere reflection of the belief that men are allowed to, nay expected to, behave maladroitly. Albeit at a professional and advisory level. Perhaps your bed wasn’t level and you required ‘advice’ on how best to lay. It would be tragically frigid of me to suggest that that you tag, or otherwise de-tag, such pictures. But you could seek revenge on the Mail and others as a vehicle for the promotion of permanently sweaty bodies in the public eye. I thank you not. For how best to handle yourself in the public eye, I propose that you become more self-effacing. Perhaps a leaf out of a certain autobiographical and A Journey entitled Primeministerial book would aid this process…





