Proper Facebook Etiquette

#943 What you want when you want it

Tuesday 29th March, 2011

Dear Mariann,
My partner wants me to change my status from single. We have an open relationship. In the gay world this is common. Is he trying to block me in and why is it OK for Hume to use gaydar
From Ian in reply to post #342 What happened last night.

Ian, yours is the kind of dilemma that is precisely why I do not do relationship status’s. Oh, the horror. All that knowledge out there in the ether for all to revel at. Ghastly.

For the record, your partner is quite right. You should change your status from ‘single’. I recommend ‘it’s complicated’, or ‘divorced’. That should get his attention.

I don’t know a lot about this state of affairs ‘being common‘, but I would add this – Yes, he IS trying to block you in. You’re that much hot stuff that he wants you all to himself. Especially for those times of day when he is not Gaydar.

Any site who’s tag line is ‘what you want, when you want it‘ has got to be an accurate indicator of our socially ambivalent times in terms of attention spans. What’s that? you’re not ‘in a relationship’ on Facebook – oh, well then I’m heading on over to my pals on Gaydar, byeeeee love!

Door SLAM.

Look, a bit of pre-empting is required for this field of fun. First a relationship update / announcement and editing of your Profile page. What about you are ‘in a relationship’ with said beau when you can update your status from the happy confines of the sofa, but then ‘its complicated’ when He’s on Gaydar. Mind, this could ensure that you are updating your status every other moment of the day – depending on how often your other half wants ‘what he wants, when he wants it‘. If only Waitrose offered the same service. Hello vegetables!

Cleverer would be to de/unfriend him on Facebook and go about stalking his ‘hot boy’ stuff on Gaydar.

More of a pronouncement would be to suggest that you are a Married man with three off-spring. That should close down his relationship requests for at least 24hours, or until the broadband falters and he can’t get access to Gaydar anymore. Acredit yourself with some smartness (you do read this blog afterall) and counter any of his ‘block in’ measures with the sheer enjoyment of being able to wind him via any Social Network Site.

2 Responses to “#943 What you want when you want it”

  1. Sandra says:

    OMG I have been told off for posting that my supervisor is fat. This is true and she is known as ‘fat sue’. We all work in a small events company and have just been involved in a slimming festival. So my post was just joking about and Sue would not mind as we all have names we sometimes call each other. That manager is called ‘hands’. Can’t the managers take a joke?

  2. What says:

    My father keeps changing his status. He says it makes him a man of mystry (he is long divorced). My friends think it is sad but one has stared coming onto him. Should I put an end to his tricks?

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