Proper Facebook Etiquette

#2066 There’s no Ferrari without hard work.

Friday 19th April, 2013

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Dear Dr M.

How did Facebook get so good, then so bad so quick?

Thanks. From Arnold, down t’pud [York]

Zuckerberg [insert StarWars intro here] The boy’s done well: Facebook the first ‘successful’ (sustainable (so far)) SNS skilfully manned by the then 18-year-old chief of ‘Social’, Mark Zuckerberg.

Profile Page for 1, including whine and service, £0

I am only a social being. If you prick me I will bleed. If you offer me something more for my friends, and me I can only say yes. And if you serve me more friend related-crap in a NewsFeed where the head of Social is a depressingly talented, smooth-cheeked man-child I will fall upon the bad in his network like a cocoa addict woken from rapturous dreams of wet dark dripped sweetness by news of cocoa carnage and the associated assurance that chocolate really isn’t ‘good for you’.

We need our dreams restored – the one that says someone so cocksure and American-centric can’t head up so many social and cultural networks without making a total arse of themselves. Unfriend.

There’s no Ferrari without hard work.

A slightly overcooked tranche of marketing tout, our skin crisped as our fleshy bits become self-exposed to crap, adverts, more crap, oh and a Friend Request from someone we might have known in 1984. Unless you were born in 1984. Like Mark was. The little s*d.

Zuckerberg is playing with us.

He is, and remains astonishingly good at marketing our Social. Remove the age factor and the sometime crap software, Facebook has a warm and friendly feel. And I suspect that the Zuckerberg chap is nice too. All that smiling on his Wikipedic page seems to suggest so.

I remain slapped in the face by the titbits of ‘stuff’ that aren’t really important. But become ever more so if I were to delete my Profile. Why so successful, cos we’re weak. And we’re addicted to cocoa.  Oh, and it’s still Free.

Just.

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